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Junirisland
Breast
Feeding
Cooking, Who Cares?
Diary High
School - 1969
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you drop
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Diary Grade 6
- 1964
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- Webster
Photographs
- Harrop
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Just left home. Yay! and on behalf of your parents may I
add, Phew.
Takeaway pizza boxes starting to mount up in the corner?
Don't care about cooking? Haven't got a clue anyway?
Come with me youngun, cobber, maaate. Trust me. I won't turn
you into a Jamie, promise.
First steps first. Plate - yes I know you have plenty of
them since grandma emptied her cupboard into your flat.
Knife - same as above. Bread - white sliced from all night
shop, fair enough. Dripping? - just kidding- Butter or
margarine. Well you should have bought some while you were
at the 7-11. Borrow some from next door. OK we're off and
racing...
Impostor sandwich - Bread and butter.
That's it! You did it. Little ripper...feeling a little
like a 4 year old again?
Now get out that frying pan. Butter bread on both sides...yah heard
me - both sides - even put some salt and pepper, maybe a
sprinkle of curry powder on it, then fry that bread on both sides, til you've got
yourself Fried Bread Baby!
Feeling Good? Just a little greasy?
Crack an egg in a bowl. Dip 2 slices of bread in, til well
coated in egg. Fry in a little butter or oil and you've got yourself
French Toast.
Do it with raisin bread and hey presto Fancy French Toast.
Other bread variations...Sauce sandwich, fairy bread and for late night
- sultanas, peanut butter and jam, or peanut butter and bacon, but don't
deepfry that lot, because that
could end in tears.
Mini pizzas- Grill one side of 4 slices of bread, spread
the uncooked side with tomato sauce, grated or sliced
cheese, chopped pineapple, ham or bacon. Grill.
Ecto one Noodles.
Really satisfies 1.
Takes 5 mins to boil, peel, crumble and grate.
Boil 1 egg for 3 mins.
Cook some 2 min noodles.
Drain. Put in a bowl.
Peel the egg.
Crumble the egg on top of the cooked noodles.
Grate some cheese on top.
Dig in.
Chicken nugget burgers.
Feeds 1.
Takes 10 mins to fry and assemble.
Just like in the school canteen.
Cook 4 chicken nuggets.
Carefully burrow a tunnel
into a long thin breadroll.
Tip in some sauce and mayonnaise.
Squish shut, to mix a bit.
Re-open. Force in some chopped lettuce
then the cooked nuggets.
Walk around outside, eating, with shirt out.
Cuposoup roll.
Stuff yourself.
Takes 5 mins to boil and hollow.
Boil the kettle and
make a packet cup of soup.
Hollow out a sturdy, round breadroll.
Tip the soup in and have fun.
(Keep the stuffing and dry it in the oven
for breadcrumbs in Garlic balls)
Garlic balls.
Feeds 4.
Takes 20 mins to mix and bake.
Mix 2 cups of breadcrumbs with
3 spoonfuls of grated onion,
1 crushed garlic clove,
2 spoonfuls of melted margarine,
1 spoonful of chopped parsley,
1 spoonful of chopped basil and
a shake of pepper.
Bind together with a little milk.
Squish into balls.
Roll in more breadcrumbs.
Sit on a greased oven tray.
Cook in a hot oven for 10 mins.
See how I eased you from 1person to 4
didn't hurt a bit
Flakey corn
Makes a heap.
Takes 20 mins to mix, cook and crush.
Mix 1/2 cup of cornflour
2 spoonfuls sugar
with 1 cup of water
and 2 teaspoons of vanilla essence.
Don't play around with it,
you can make your own 'mercury' later.
Lightly grease an oven tray, preferably with real
butter.
Pour the mixture onto the tray.
Bake in a hot oven 10 mins,
or until golden brown.
Run a rolling pin over it
to crack into flakes.
Eat straight away.
Stuffed pocket bread.
Takes 10 mins to butter and stuff.
Make a small split in a lebanese bread round
and roughly butter inside.
Can make a sweet filling : jam,
peanut butter and sultanas.
Or, tip in some mayonnaise, then,
stuff with whatever you fancy/have at hand :
Shredded lettuce, chopped tomato, cheese,
ham, cold leftover meat.
Cut in half and eat, starting with the cut edge.
Stuff yourself.
Don't do what you used to do with an icecream
and try to suck the filling out
through a hole in the folded edge.
Beerybeef
Feeds 4.
Takes 1 hour to fry, grate, simmer and thicken.
Fry 4 handfuls of minced beef in a big saucepan
Grate in
1 onion,
1 carrot/ parsnip /zucchini.
Crush in 1 clove garlic.
Pour in 1 can of beer,
can use flat beer, or failed home brew
but best to go with a fresh can
Sprinkle in parsley and pepper.
Simmer for 15 mins. Stir a bit
Can try microwaving it all
Thicken with a little
cornflour and water, if liked.
Serve on toast.
Quick Pumpkin soup.
Feeds 4.
Takes 3/4 hour to grate, simmer and serve.
Put 4 cups of water and a big spoonful of chicken stock
powder
or two chicken stock cubes
or a tin of chicken soup
into a big saucepan. Bring to boil.
Grate and add
2 peeled potatoes.
Leave the skin on 4 big chunks of pumpkin
for something to hang on to while you grate it
Don't get bits of green skin in as they are annoying to spit
out
You can try hacking the skin off the pumpkin first,
but not if you value your fingers
Simmer for 20 mins or as long as you can wait
Add 1 cup of milk.
Heat through and serve.
Egg and lettuce soup.
Feeds 4.
Takes 30 mins to simmer, chop and heat.
Make proper chicken stock
with 4 cups of water,
4 chicken wings, 2 chopped spring onions
a knob of fresh ginger and a spoonful of soy sauce
Simmer for 20 mins
Carefully remove chicken wings
putting one in each serving bowl
Throw ginger at nearest pigeon
Bring stock to boil
Add 1 handful of corn kernels.
Finely chop 2 handfuls of lettuce.
Beat 1 egg.
Stir lettuce into stock.
Boil for 30 seconds.
Briskly stir egg into soup.
Pour a cup full over each chicken wing.
Taunt pigeons with demise of chickens.
Slurp soup with large spoon.
Tart's pasta
Feeds 4.
Takes 20 mins to boil, chop, fry, stir and serve.
Boil a big pot of water.
Add a dash of oil, so the pasta won't stick together.
Cook 2-4 cups of pasta for about 10 mins
or whatever it says on the packet.
Drain.
If you've cooked too much pasta,
save some for Pasta Frittata
Meaniewhile,
in a big saucepan
fry some chopped garlic
and a couple of anchovies in some olive oil.
Stir in a tin of tomatoes,
a slurp of wine,
1/2 cup of sliced, black olives
and 2 spoonfuls of capers. (if you have them)
Mix the drained pasta into the sauce
Serve, in a short red skirt, topped with chopped
parsley.
Pasta Frittata.
Feeds 4.
Takes 3/4 hour to grate, mix and bake.
Grate :
1 zucchini, 1 carrot and1 onion.
Crush 1 clove of garlic.
Chop any cold cooked leftover meat -
chicken, ham or bacon.
Chop some parsley and chives.
Mix all with 4 beaten eggs,
1/2 cup of milk,
1/2 cup of cheese and
1 cup of leftover cooked pasta.
Bake, uncovered, in a mod oven
for 30 mins.
Soft cheesy Polenta.
Fills up 4.
Put 1 cup of polenta/cornmeal
in a big saucepan with
2 and 1/2 cups of cold water.
Stir constantly over a low heat
For 5 mins, or until smooth and thickened.
Stir in 1/4 cup of parmesan cheese
and 1/2 cup of grated cheese.
Serve when mixed in and hot.
It's not freaken fried rice.
Feeds 4.
Takes 20 mins to boil, chop, stir fry and mix.
Cook a packet or 2 of
plain or chicken or any flavored couscous.
Chop some cabbage, spring onions
and red capsicum.
Stir fry vegetables.
Add some frozen corn and peas,
then scrape out of wok, onto a plate.
Cover with another plate to keep warm.
Wipe out wok. Heat again.
Stir fry 4 handfuls of chicken mince.
Add cooked veges and cooked couscous.
Heat through and serve.
Vegetable rice blobs.
Feeds 4.
Have your assistant
Grate a zucchini and a carrot into a large bowl.
Decide how hungry everyone is
Are they hanging on your every action, oh master chef
or still on their computers?
Add 1 or 2 cups of cooked rice.
Stir in 1 or 2 tablespoons of plain flour.
Add 1 or 2 beaten eggs
and some pepper, parsley and chives.
Heat some oil in a frying pan.
Cook blobs of about 2 spoonfuls of mixture.
Drain on paper towel.
Depending on hunger level
pass to crowd immediately
or keep warm in the oven
until all cooked.
Sweet Potato, Potato and onion bake.
Feeds 4.
Peel and chop into large cubes,
1 large sweet potato,
2 large potatoes,
1 onion.
Pat dry.
Spread out on a baking tray or big casserole
Sprinkle with olive oil,
and fresh sage leaves
oh alright then any old dried herbs
Bake in a hot oven for 30 mins.
Spicy cauliflower and potato.
Feeds 4.
Takes 1/2 hour to peel, cube, fry, simmer and thicken.
Peel 2- 4 potatoes and cut into large cubes.
Break a quarter - half a cauliflower into little trees.
Mix into a cup about a 1 teaspoon each of :
mustard seeds,
crushed garlic,
chopped fresh ginger, or a little powdered ginger
tumeric powder
and cumin powder or seeds.
Heat some oil in a large saucepan,
stir all the spices around for a few secs
but don't burn them
smoke not good.
Add the potato, stir for 2 mins,
add cauliflower,
then 1- 2 cups of water
Cover and simmer 15 mins or
until veges are soft.
Thicken liquid with a
little cornflour mixed in cold water.
Tzatziki - Yoghurt dip
Makes 2 cups.
Takes 10 mins to grate, crush and mix.
Best if made the night before.
Peel, seed and grate (or finely chop)
1 small cucumber.
Drain off excess liquid.
Peel and crush 2 garlic cloves.
Stir cucumber and garlic into
1 tub of plain yoghurt.
Add 2 teaspoons of lemon juice.
Chop 1 spoonful of fresh mint
and one of dill.
Stir into yoghurt
with a shake of pepper and salt.
Best made with fresh herbs, so buy some,
beg some from the old lady down the road
or grow some in a big pot.
Aunty Jenny's tart.
Feeds 4.
Takes 1 hour to chop, stir, melt and bake.
Into a big bowl, chop :
2 tomatoes,
2 rashers of bacon,
and 1 onion.
Stir in :
1 cup of corn,
1/2 cup of grated cheese,
1 and 1/2 cups of milk,
4 beaten eggs,
1/2 cup of SR flour
and 3 spoonfuls of melted butter.
Pour into a greased pie tin.
Bake in a mod oven 45 mins.
NB. Your Aunty has never even pretended to be a tart.
Not effing Fish Muffins again, mum.
Feeds 4.
Takes 3/4 hour to steam, mix and bake.
Microwave/steam or simmer
2 fillets of fish. Take out any bones and skin.
Pull apart into little bits.
Mix with 1 cup of mashed potato,
2 beaten eggs,
1 handful of fresh, chopped dill,
1 handful of chopped fresh parsley,
some chopped chives,
1/2 cup milk and1 cup of sifted SR flour. Stir all
together.
Cook in greased muffin pans in a mod hot oven for 30
mins.
Serve with coffee, if you're in a really bad mood.
Bobotie.
Feeds 4.
Takes 1 and 1/2 hours to absorb, beat, fry, mix and
bake.
Have your assistant cover 4-6 slices of bread
on a deep plate/tray with milk.
When the milk has absorbed, mush up
and beat in 2 eggs
as well as 4 handfuls of minced lamb
and some crushed cashews or pine nuts or pistachio nuts.
That should keep your assistant entertained
but warn them you counted all the nuts.
Heat some oil and cook 1 sliced onion.
Add 1 big spoonful of curry powder,
1/2 teaspoon salt, 1 teaspoon sugar
and 2 squeezes of lemon juice.
Stir well. Cool a bit.
Mix into bread and mince mixture.
Tip that lot into a big casserole.
Bake in a mod oven for 1 hour.
Nearly Chilli con carne.
Feeds 4.
Takes 1 and 1/4 hours to chop, fry, open cans and
simmer.
Chop 1 onion, 2 garlic cloves,
a quarter of a chopped red or green capsicum
2-4 mushrooms
Fry all in a big saucepan with a little oil.
Add 4 handfuls of minced beef.
Stir about for 5 mins.
Add 1 can of tomatoes,
1 can of red kidney beans
or a tin of corn & bean mix
and a slurp of sweet chilli sauce
Cover and simmer 1 hour.
Thicken, if liked, with
a little cornflour and water.
Spicy lamb chops.
Feeds 4.
Takes 4-24 hours to mix, marinade and bake.
Good to make up the night before
Trim the fat off 8 BBQ lamb chops.
Mix together 1 spoonful each of :
mixed spice,
dry mustard and
curry powder.
Add 1/2 spoonful of ginger,
2 spoonfuls of brown sugar and
2 spoonfuls of plain flour.
Stir well, then add :
1/2 cup of tomato sauce,
1/2 cup of water and
2 spoonfuls of vinegar.
Put chops and marinade
in a large casserole.
Can cook straight away, but
let sit in the fridge for a few hours
or overnight if possible.
Cook in a mod - slow oven
for 2 hours.
Chicken balls.
Feeds 4.
First, catch several chickens and de-ba...
no, no that's wrong..
Takes 1/2 hour to beat, mix, roll and simmer.
Mix 4 handfuls of chicken mince with
1 beaten egg,
4 spoonfuls of breadcrumbs and
4 spoonfuls of cream.
Roll into small balls.
Sit in the fridge, while heating
1 tin of chicken soup
mixed with 1/2 tin of water.
Get your balls out of the fridge.
Simmer in the soup for 15 mins.
Serve in a bowl with a spoon.
Chocy Icecream.
Feeds 1 sincere icecream eater
or 6 willing to barter.
Takes 12 hours to grate, beat, heat, mix, freeze, whisk and
freeze.
Grate a block of dark cooking chocolate, or your favorite
chocy bar
Put 8 egg yolks in a big bowl.
(keep the egg whites aside for
pavlova/meringue/omelettes)
Beat the bejeebers out of the yolks until, thick and
pale.
Put 1/2 cup of Milo or sifted chocy powder in a large
saucepan,
Stir in 3 cups of milk and 1 cup of cream.
Heat slowly, stirring constantly until almost boiling.
Stir in the grated chocolate.
Whisk the hot milk mixture into the egg mixture.
Pour into a clean ice cream tub.
Freeze for 1/2 hour or until it starts to freeze.
Beat again. Freeze. Beat again. Freeze. Beat again.
Then let it freeze all night.
Keep tabs on the ice cream sneaker.
Breadcrumb biscuits.
Makes 20.
Takes 1/2 hour to beat, mix, roll and bake.
Beat 4 spoonfuls of margarine,
4 spoonfuls of sugar
and 1 spoonful of Golden Syrup or Maple syrup or honey
Mix in 4 spoonfuls of dry, fine breadcrumbs,
4 spoonfuls of SR flour
1 spoonful coconut
and 1 spoonful of grated fresh ginger.
Mix in a little milk
to make a firm dough.
Roll into little balls.
Flatten on a greased oven tray.
Bake for 15 mins in a mod oven.
Fruit loaf pies.
Feeds 4.
Lightly butter both sides of 8 slices
of fruit loaf / raisin bread.
Use a large glass, mug or egg ring
to cut each slice into a circle
that will fit into your individual pie tins,
muffin pans or ramekins...
could even use heatproof tea cups.
After squishing each round into order,
so they resemble pastry cases,
fill with whatever sweet stuff you have at hand :
eg Mix :
1 spoonful of jam,
1 spoonful of sultanas
1 spoonful of coconut
and 4 chopped peaches.
Bake for 10 mins in a mod hot oven.
Will make 8 open pies
or 4 with lids.
Evon's Debbie pudding.
Feeds 6.
Takes 3/4 hour to beat, mix and bake.
Cream 1 big spoonful of butter
with 1/2 cup of caster sugar.
Beat in 1 egg.
Fold in 1 cup of sifted SR flour
and 1 big spoonful of cocoa powder.
Stir in 1/2 cup of milk.
Pour into a greased cake tin.
Mix 1/2 a cup of sugar with
1 spoonful of cocoa, then
sprinkle this over the cake mixture.
Carefully pour 1 and 1/2 cups of hot water
over all.
Bake in a mod hot oven for 30 mins.
Can try microwaving it, but not as gluggy if cooked in
oven
A smooth chocy sauce
will magically form on the bottom
of the cake.
Serve with cream or icecream.
Juniris' Pate.
Feeds 4.
Takes 1 hour to chop, cook, mince and clean up.
If you don't have a mincer/bamix
then finely chop everything.
Chop 300gms of frozen chicken livers,
while still frozen as it makes the job a bit easier.
Discard any extremely gross bits
by flicking them in the sink
to see how long they will stick to the side.
Crush 2 cloves of garlic.
Chop 1 onion and
4 handfuls of fresh parsley.
Revive person who has innocently
come for a glass of water.
Melt 4 spoonfuls of margarine in a large frying pan.
Tip everything in and mix around.
Add 1 spoonful each of :
dried thyme, sage and rosemary
or big handfuls of fresh herbs
to disguise the taste of the livers
Sing the song about parsley, sage and whatever
Slurp in 2 spoonfuls of sherry
and a bay leaf or two.
Cook about 10 mins or
until all pink has gone from the livers.
Remove bay leaves.
Pulverise with a wooden spoon
or put through a mincer or bamix
Put into ramekins/bowls
and cover with silver foil.
Store in fridge.
Eat on toast within a week.
If you would like me to print and post you my other 300
recipes,
at minimal cost
email me at
thejuniris@hotmail.com
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